#okay i know some people hate this scene because they think it’s whedon making fun of cap#and that might have been how he intended it#but the way evans and rdj played it is so perfect#because there’s steve’s sass coming back#’seriously?’#’seriously tony?’#’what exactly are you expecting from me?’#’it’s been like a week and a half since i got here from the 40s’#’what does it look like?’#’well it seems to run on some form of electricity’#unspoken ‘you moron’#and tony’s response is just like#’i don’t know what i was expecting’#’you got me there’#i don’t know#i just thought the two of them played it perfectly off each other [via invisiblespork]
Steve Rogers did, in fact, realize that something was off when he saw the outline of the woman’s odd bra (a push-up bra, he would later learn), but being an officer and a gentleman, he said that it was the game that gave the future away.
Victor Hugo goes up to the counter and describes the drink he wants in detail for an hour, laying out the minutiae of the process, presentation, and backstory of his extremely simple dark roast with sugar. By the time he’s finished, the store is closed, the barista has left, and Victor returns home empty-handed.
Achilles goes up to the counter, oozing confidence. He orders two venti caramel macchiatos. “That’s a lot of coffee,” says the barista. “Are you sure you can handle it?” “Of course!” cries Achilles. “I’m practically immortal!”
He gets the drinks and begins to walk out of the store. He trips over the threshold, and a little bit of the scalding hot coffee spills down the back of his leg. He dies immediately.
- The guy living below me has a really loud alarm clock that always wakes me up at the ass crack of dawn AU
- I went to investigate a scream and found my neighbour standing on a chair to avoid a rat/cockroach/snake AU
- My neighbour has a really squeaky bed and my bedroom is right below theirs AU
- Someone keeps stealing my doormat AU
- My pet tarantula escaped and I forgot to warn the guy below me who is scared of spiders AU
- I need you to pet sit my pet this weekend and I forgot to mention it’s a giant snake, the mice are in the freezer, thanks bye! AU
- The apartment above me has left their tap on or something and water is LEAKING THROUGH MY CEILING WTF! AU
- My neighbour’s sister got the wrong house number and barged into my apartment AU
- The guy next door/my roommate always steals my coffee, so I started to make extra AU
APARTMENT AUs! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ
do you think that when fred and george started hogwarts all the teachers were like “ahh more weasleys. lovely. their brothers were such good students i’m sure they’ll be just the same.” and then the twins walked into their first class and just SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKERS
no i’m not gonna lend you my pencil because if i lend you my pencil then you’ll want my calculator and then you’ll want austria and czechoslovakia and then you’ll end up invading poland and i will not have that shit
895. Muggleborns wonder why there’s a large group of friendly, teenage ghosts around Hogwarts. They’re led by a funny boy with red hair who likes to joke around with Peeves, and he always says that they’re Dumbledore’s Last Army.
I’ve cried myself dry.